10 Things I Wish I Told My Younger Self

"Whether it is a meeting by chance or a major event, every occurrence will affect the future, for a man's path of life is not only unstoppable, it is also neverending. The smallest thing, the shortest amount of time, the littlest piece of record of memory... the fate that accompanies you will never disappear." 



Before delving any deeper into the subject, just let me say - yes, i do believe in fate.

I believe that we are free to make our own choices, but the many things that happen in our lives are fated. What we make of it, is up to us, but the occurrence that happens, is meant to be.

As such, i explain it as -

If i am at [Point A] and my fate dictates that i must arrive at [Point B], I will eventually arrive at [Point B], no matter what i do. But like travelling between destinations, my choices and my reactions will affect the rate by which i arrive to [Point B]. Such as - I can travel from Vancouver to Seattle via plane, via car, via foot - that is a choice, and it is up to me. No matter what i do, i will eventually arrive at Seattle - but as we can see, some methods are more efficient than others.

As such, i believe that every meeting, every occurrence, that happens in my life, happens because it is meant to be.

Despite my firm belief in such, there are still many things, many life lessons, that i wish i could have told my "younger self," had i had the chance to time travel.




No doubt, i am speaking to a 15, 16, 17-year-old me, and i am still young, 18 in only a few short days. But i have changed, because a person is constantly changing, constantly being influenced by the people around them, by their dreams, by their environment.

I may not be drastically different from who i was back then, but with what little knowledge i have gained now,

These are the 10 things i wish i could tell my younger self.







10) Don't be afraid to speak out. Don't live your life constantly wording and rewording your sentences, thinking twice before speaking, worrying that it won't be received well. If you think it you can speak it - those who mind don't matter, and those who matter, won't mind. Don't let yourself be silenced by your fear.



9) Don't let other people bully you. You may stay with a certain person or people out of fear of rejection, or because they are blackmailing you, emotionally abusing you, any of the myriad of reasons. But whatever their intentions, whatever their meaning, you are better than this. Don't let people push you around or let them try and dictate your life. And if they can't respect your choices or make you feel good about yourself at the end of the day, they're not worth it. Don't waste time with people that don't create value or love in your life.



8) Party hard. Going against everything that parents say, let loose and party hard. Whatever people say about responsibility, or taking caution, throw that to the wind. Let loose, get blackout drunk, kiss a few boys, and live it up. Dance your heart out. There's no shame in doing what you want to do, and anyone who says otherwise is wrong. They'll live their life, you live yours. Don't let social constraints stop you from having a good time.



7) It's okay to have some quiet alone time. You might think that being at the centre and hub of all happenings is great, and may feel lost without someone to keep you afloat, but remember that alone time is also something to be cherished. Take it as a time to centre yourself so you can be fabulous once you get back to being around people.



6) Take chances. It's better to have tried and failed than to never try at all. They say that life begins at the end of your comfort zone, and it's true. Whenever something makes you feel iffy or nervous, go for it. Whether or not you enjoy it, at least now you have an extra experience to call your own. When an opportunity presents itself, jump for it. If you spend time pondering and find that it's too late, you'll end up scrounging around hoping for another opportunity. Seize the day. Don't let your inhibitions hold you back from achieving your potential.



5) Be yourself. This means more than just expressing yourself and all your quirks. Remember your values, where you came from, what you find important in life. It is so easy to get swept along with all the new opportunities and people that you forget your distinguishing features. Don't soften or sweeten up because you think you should. If people don't like you for you, then it's time to rethink if they're worth it at all. Be you, because that's when you know your friends are there for you and not a fake. Don't let your idealistic view of yourself stop you from expressing your personality.



4) No means no. As much as we all joke about "no means yes" or "if he was cute," No means no. Unless you giggle. Or actually mean yes. Then no means yes. Don't let anyone convince you otherwise. Don't let anyone victim-blame. Remember that first and foremost you need to care about your own safety. Your friends are there to support that too. And if someone insists on participating in rape culture or victim-blaming, cut them out of your life. (or at least, don't party with them). This sort of behaviour is dangerous to you. While everyone is entitled to their own opinion, you are entitled to your safety. Don't let pop culture change the meaning of consent.



3) Don't let your happiness depend on another person. Great if you're connected at the hips and cannot be separated, but never let your happiness depend on another person. We are all human and inevitably, we all seek the best for ourselves. You would jump at better opportunities, as would they. Find your soul sistas, and find happiness in their company, but don't depend on them entirely for the concept known as happiness. Don't let other people run your world.



2) Get back up. You will fall, literally and figuratively. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and remember that anything that doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger. Remember: better a diamond with a flaw, than a pebble without. Sometimes you will have people there to pick you up, and other times you won't - but no matter if you're surrounded by loved ones or by yourself, get up before the mud stains, those jeans are designer! Don't be afraid of failure, nobody is perfect.



1) Appreciate life. Look up from your phone. Life is happening. Enjoy it. Every little moment, take the time to cherish it. You don't know what will happen tomorrow, so enjoy today. Don't let your past hold you back from your future.